RANT

Remember when Grandma warned ya...playing with that thing'll make ya go blind....well Pfizer didn't seem to mind the hairy palms...but the profits that providing the elderly with erections is just astronomical (say stiff investors)....now what? Now we've got blind alzheimer's patients running around with erections...this is a law suit in the making. I don't think I'll visit Grandpa this week.

To all those who would blog about porn til they went blind on perscription drugs......
please get a life or prove your a brave lot ... and commit mass suicide

Oliver Stone: found drunk and smoking weed through an actual shotgun was overheard mumbling to himself..."Lemmyat another Tarantino script...I need ya Quentin, I gotta have ya." Lifting the shotgun to his mouth for yet another toke of what might have been crack he exclaimed "Say hello to my little friend," and threw up on himself.

Karla Homolka, everybody's favorite murderess, is soon to be out of jail. Wow, for someone who killed and sexually abused her own dying sister she's really cleaned up! Thank God for lawyers and their infinite...if bureaucratic, wisdom.

Apparently the new Pope is going to heal some Christian rifts...he'll be applying Band-Aids to rectums.

Now that Martha Stewart is out of jail she's coming out with a few new products for the ex-con in us all. New this season...shanked turkey roast, it comes complete with a razor blade melted into a toothbrush handle to carve those extra thin sandwich slices. Hoosegaw gin 'n juice, just like Cell Block 1 makes it....with extra crack. And last but not least...crack on a stick...you just lick the crack....apparently Mrs. Stewart did alot of that while she was in the can...apparently she misses it.

Vice President Dick Cheney today said he was offended by Amnesty International's condemnation of the United States...Cheney then responded with air strikes on Amnesty's offices and deported all survivors to Guantanamo Bay.

Paris Hilton got off her knees today, wiped her chin and then...she was overheard saying "walking really sucks"...she fell back down to her knees and finished her visit by riding daddy's coattails back to the west coast...where apparently she'll be starring in another low light special....Martha does Paris.

And if that's not strange enough....check out the dude who summoned up a UFO on air
http://www.filecabi.net/v.php?file=ufoondemand.wmv